The Amber Dog

Tsar Nicholas II’s uncle by marriage, King Edward VII (d. 1910) was the first British monarch to decree that since his birthday was in wet and grey November, its ‘official’ celebration should be moved to the summer. His great granddaughter Queen Elizabeth II was born in April, when the weather also tends to be a bit mixed, so Saturday 11 June 2016 was appointed as her official 90th birthday. What made this particularly interesting to me was that it coincided with an important football match between Russia and England.

When I arrived at the Mamonovo border crossing on 25 May 2016, the official who checked my passport decided I should be given extra scrutiny, so I was interviewed by two of her colleagues. To put their minds at rest I cited Inga as one of my contacts in Kaliningrad; and indeed my two previous visits, as a guest of IKBFU in 2012 and 2014 (without which I could never have realised my aims on this trip) were made possible only by Inga selflessly sparing time to clear bureaucratic obstacles on my behalf. Moreover I was keen to see her of course, my former colleague and friend whom I’d first met seventeen years earlier, though I had no wish to believe it would be my last opportunity. But meanwhile I explained to the guards that my principal objective was to give a talk at a church in the small town of Znamensk, about a charity called Mary’s Meals. The delay caused by this interview however, meant the coach I’d travelled on from Gdansk had to leave without me, so I ended up being given a lift to Kaliningrad by an Azeri truck driver. In conversation with him, it was very useful that I knew the name of Tofiq Bahramov.

According to legend, the man known to countless English football fans as ‘the Russian linesman’ (in spite of his hailing from Azerbaijan) was given a gold whistle by Queen Elizabeth in gratitude for his award of a controversial goal to England in the 1966 World Cup final. In fact it was customary for the referee of the final to get a gold whistle; in 1966 there was only a slight change when both his assistants received them too. [1] [2] Nonetheless, to this day there are those who think the Queen intentionally sought to ensure that Mr Bahramov’s part in England’s victory over West Germany did not go unrecognised.

Queen Elizabeth’s sense of humour surfaced more unambiguously in April 2014, when she met Pope Francis for the first time. Presenting the Pontiff with a set of signed photographs of herself and her husband, she said,

“I’m afraid you have to have a photograph, it’s inevitable.”[3]

Clearly she found this particular protocol a bit of a bore; and no doubt she would have had exactly the same reservations about the identikit pictures given to Patriarch Kirill of Moscow and All Russia, on his visit to Buckingham Palace on 18 October 2016. Even so, in view of the prevailing chill in relations between Russia and Britain at the time, an important thing to note about this meeting is that it exceeded all expectations. Before his departure from Luton Airport, the Patriarch told journalists:

“I am very pleased with the [results of] this meeting and I must say that I did not expect it to take place in such an atmosphere and at such an active level as it did. She has bright beaming eyes, a wonderful reaction to words, to questions, to the conversation. She herself talked a lot and said very right, clever things that were interesting to listen to. This conversation made a very pleasant impression on me intellectually and emotionally.”

What’s more however, on this occasion there is reason to suspect that a certain high-profile Royal may have been behind a decision to furnish her guest with a souvenir that certainly doesn’t find its way into many a tourist’s hand luggage. The day before the palace meeting, Patriarch Kirill’s entourage had its ranks unexpectedly swelled by the addition of a yellow Pembrokeshire Welsh Corgi puppy. 

Archbishop Justin Welby looks on as Patriarch Kirill receives a Pembrokeshire Welsh Corgi puppy, London, 17 October 2016 [4]

On the face of it this was a gift from the Russian Orthodox Cathedral of the Dormition in London, where Prince Michael of Kent, the Queen’s cousin who bears a striking resemblance to Tsar Nicholas II, is known to worship. Patriarch Kirill was delighted with his present:

“The dog is wonderful, and since I spend a considerable part of my personal life completely alone, it is very pleasant for me to know that there will be a reliable friend to share my solitude.”

But the intriguing thing is that Pembrokeshire Welsh Corgis are exactly the breed to which Queen Elizabeth has been especially devoted, for almost all of her 91 years.[5]

There’s a picture of a dog sculpted out of amber (Figure 2) on page 91 of a book Inga gave me for my 40th birthday, which I celebrated in September 2014 with a few friends in one of Kaliningrad’s ‘Britannica’ English-style pubs.

Figure 2: amber dog on p.91 of The Poetry of Amber, Mastery and Discovery by Gennady Losets[6]

In Figure 3, Gennady Losets’ The Poetry of Amber, Mastery and Discovery is visible underneath the box of chocolates she also gave me, next to my glass of ‘amber nectar’.[7] Incidentally, underneath that book one can just see the corner of another tome, Robin Dunbar’s fascinating Grooming, Gossip and the Evolution of Language, which I would never have read if Inga hadn’t given it to me, but which turned out to have a direct bearing on writing I’ve been doing, about Africa.

Figure 3: the author's 40th birthday celebration, in the company of Inga and other friends, Kaliningrad, September 2014. Two books are visible, underneath the box of chocolates.

Inga’s scientific interest in differences between male and female communication perhaps helped her to tolerate the occasions when I talked about football. In one of our last conversations, I told her how appalled I was to learn that someone had shone a green laser into Russian goalkeeper Igor Akinfeev’s face, just before Algeria’s equalizer against Russia in the Brazil World Cup (I’d seen similar behaviour in Morocco, in a game featuring one of Casablanca’s teams).[8] I also made a ‘Soviet-era’ joke, that if Akinfeev had a very traumatic time in the game against England, then perhaps Russian TV would feel obliged to show Swan Lake. Approximately, this was also when Inga put her birthday tribute for Queen Elizabeth inside another book, which I later sent from Kaliningrad.

The Shed That Fed A Million Children, which tells the story of Mary’s Meals, should one day appear in a Russian edition, thanks to the translating efforts of another of my dearest Kaliningrad friends. As regards the copy I sent to the Queen however; Inga was one of about a dozen local residents who put birthday greetings inside. Although I don’t have a photograph of those messages, I do have pictures of the card I sent at the same time (Figures 4-7). The front shows the scene in the Britannica pub where I watched Russia vs. England; another friend did the enlargement of the image of the Queen holding a pint of amber nectar, as if to toast her own birthday.

Figure 4: front of card showing the interior of Britannica pub on the Queen's official 90th birthday. The match between Russia and England finished 1-1.

Figure 5: Message inside card sent to Buckingham Palace from Kaliningrad, June 2016

Among the things inside the card, Inga tipped me off about the building rumoured to have been the residence at one time of a British government representative.

Figure 6: information about Kaliningrad inside the Queen's birthday card

Figure 7: back of the Queen's birthday card, showing Britannica pub, Kaliningrad, with Russian, British and EU flags. The card was dated and sent from Kaliningrad on the day Britain (England) voted to leave the EU

Having put the book and card into the post on 23rd June 2016 (the day of the UK’s vote to leave the EU, after which England’s footballers went to pieces), the letter dated 14 September from Balmoral Castle showed that the Queen received them (Figures 8-9). The question then is whether they might have made any difference to her meeting with Patriarch Kirill a month later. I think they did, firstly because she and her daughter Princess Anne are well aware of Mary’s Meals and its founder, Magnus MacFarlane-Barrow OBE, who wrote The Shed That Fed A Million Children.[9] More specifically however, I think the things she received from Kaliningrad made an impression because although footballing honours were shared in the game between Russia and England, it was marred by hooliganism between rival supporters. Without dwelling on who was to blame or who came off worse; the point is that an opportunity for the two countries to ‘let off steam’ turned into an excuse for yet more bad feeling. Since it took place on her official 90th birthday, the Queen at the very least would have stayed informed of the score-line; inevitably therefore, the violent disturbances must have left her with some measure of disappointment. That’s why I believe the book, with its cheerful and affectionate birthday messages, and the card, would likely have helped restore her sense that far from wishing Britain any harm, Russians are naturally inclined to be friendly towards us.

So can one infer from all this that Inga played an indispensable role in the events which led to Patriarch Kirill being given a Corgi? In my opinion it’s reasonable to think so. I only wish it was possible to ask her what she thinks.

Figure 8: card and letter sent from Balmoral Castle, Scotland, September 2016

Figure 9: text of letter sent on behalf of Queen Elizabeth II, dated 14 September 2016

[1] Brian Cronin, Sports Urban Legends Revealed, 22-06-2014

[2] ‘Azerbaijan set to unveil golden whistle from 1966 World Cup final’, Gulf Times, 30-07-2016

[3] Nick Squires, ‘The Queen Meets Pope Francis on Visit to Rome’, Daily Telegraph, 03-04-2014

[4] ‘Patriarch Kirill is given a corgi puppy’, LENTA.RU, 17-10-2016. Photo: Alexander Volkov https://lenta.ru/news/2016/10/17/korgi_patriarha/

[5] Andrew Pierce, ‘Hug for Queen Elizabeth’s first corgi’, Daily Telegraph, 01-10-2007

[6] OOO «ЖИВЁМ» Калининград, 2012. ISBN 978-5-903400-24-9

[7] Australian colloquialism, meaning light-coloured beer

[8] ‘World Cup 2014: Russia goalkeeper targeted by laser’, BBC News, 27-06-2014

[9] See MacFarlane-Barrow, ‘The Shed That Fed A Million Children’, HarperCollins, 2015, pp.237-8. In May 2017 Magnus gained first-hand knowledge of Princess Anne’s interest in the work of Mary’s Meals, when he was placed next to her at a formal banquet at Holyrood Palace in Edinburgh.